Pregnant Woman Thought Ramblings

I know I have long missed my 24 week update. Hopefully you will get 2 in a row coming up.

I just wanted to take a minute and jot down some things that have been swirling around in my head.
I have had a relatively easy pregnancy, I am very grateful for that. However that being said: I do NOT enjoy being pregnant! I am so NOT glowing and I am not loving this "growing a human being" time period. At this point, little L may be an only child. I had always thought I'd have 3-5 kids! I wanted kids. I would also like the have opposite gender siblings. We will see how the next 4 months go, and how labor/delivery go, how newborndom goes. Maybe I'll have rose colored glasses on by the end of it, and think about another one down the road. I understand newborndom is hard, but I am so ready for it. I am 25 weeks and already at the point of "get this thing out of me!!" 1 day past my official due date my butt is marching in there and getting induced, little L is NOT going to sit in there and stew and get larger and larger!
I think it's a combination not only of the delicate process that is growing a human child, but also the diabetes factor. The huge major added stress of keeping that under control! My body is going though a lot of changes and the handle on diabetes is getting more stressful and cumbersome. I become insulin resistant as the placenta grows, which that takes more of the insulin than my body, so that causes higher blood sugars. 4 weeks ago if I ate a bowl of oatmeal for breakfast I would give 4.0 units of insulin, now for that same bowl of oatmeal I am up to 7.0 or 8.0 units, depending on what my blood is before eating.
The insulin resistance is a "good" thing in theory, because that means there is a healthy placenta. If we start going the other way, less insulin and lower sugars, that means the placenta is breaking down.
Also not enjoying my high risk OB. I unfortunately did not have the luxury of interviewing and finding a high risk OB I liked. My old OB, was less than useless in helping with a referral. I had to go with basically who I found. And FYI there are not a lot of options for high risk in south FL.
He has unrealistic expectations about where my bloods should be kept (ie: between 120-140). He talked about putting my on shots last time I was there. Um.... NO! H-E-double hockey sticks NO! I have a great relationship with my endo, we will figure out to do on HIS end.
I am not the type of pregnant mom who is over the moon, and gushing and touching, and poking and prodding my belly. Any Dr appointments with the ultrasound I am more just staring at the screen watching what they are doing. I am not all smiles and giggle and "ohhh's" and "ahhhh's". I am grateful little L is moving and jiving in there, I am grateful when I hear the heartbeat, but that's it.
Josh has finally felt it move and he has been ecstatic ever since.

I am uncomfortable, my clothes don't fit (obviously). I have finally broken out the maternity jeans, which are not as bad as I originally thought, still not the biggest fan. I can't do anything/not allowed to do anything. Mom and Josh won't let me ride my bike. Mom won't let me pick up and carry a bag of potatoes. I can't climb on a ladder or chair, I can't pick up Whiskey (I do, too bad!!!). I get starving, eat 2 bits and I'm full and uncomfortable.

I am very glad and thankful I have some friends who have done this before me. I can confide in them and ask those weird silly questions and don't get judged!

I am also in complete and utter denial about Whiskey and our kitten Mackie, they are my babies. I know that when L comes, they will just be a dog and a cat, they will be second class citizens, but I can not wrap my head around that. I am going kicking and screaming that will happen. I will not get rid of them, I will not stick them outside, I will not! They are as much as part of the family as little L will be.

I will over the moon once little L is here and we are both healthy and safe, until then I will continue to worry and be stressed and not enjoy being pregnant. Just counting down the days until February.

Doctor Update

I had an appointment with my endocrinologist this last week. For the last 10+ years I have seen him, I have given up on controlling my blood sugars and doing everything "right" For many of those years I'd bring my meter, which was useless, because there was nothing on it for them to download. We had to take some extreme measures to keep things under some sort of control. My A1C  (<- Please click the link to learn what an A1C is) use to be in the high 8's and possibly a 9 in there at one point. (to sum that up... NOT good!!) While we were planning the wedding, Josh and I obviously knew we wanted to start a family, I had to do a lot of work on my end to make sure everything could be as good as possible. I asked my Dr what I needed to do to prepare for this next step. He said, DO YOUR BLOODS, and keep them low the lower the better.
Ok. Step 1 was handed out to me on a silver platter, I just had to do what I knew what was right. I tried my best to get on a schedule of some sorts and do my bloods. I was doing pretty good with them, especially during the week, when I had some normality to my time frames and food. My appointment back with him was better, my A1C came down to the mid 7's. This is right before we left for our honeymoon.
Coming back from our honeymoon I had to call him to say "I believe I'm pregnant". I had blood paper to go take care of before my appointment with him got moved up from its original date. I got to the office and was sitting in the room waiting for him to come in. He's a very boisterous talker and I could hear him a few rooms away with someone else. He busted into my room to grab an instrument that he needed, while doing so he starts laughing at me then says "You really can behave when you want to".
Yes, that's true, I know how to take care of myself, I just didn't want to deal with it anymore. I had to deal with it and apparently was doing a decent job.Little did I know how well of a job.
He finally came in to see me and my A1C was 6.3. Pretty darn great! I was so excited! I was also having some MAJOR low blood sugars in the late afternoon that needed to be fixed.
Thankfully Josh has finally learned the signs of a low blood sugar from me. To sum it up, I act like a needy 5-year old and I speak verrrrrrry slowly.
We adjusted my basal rate quite dramatically, I was honestly worried we were going to make it rebound the other way around and I would shoot up high in mid-afternoon. I kept a close eye on that time of day and kept everything tightly knit.
Flash forward to my appointment a few weeks ago. I knew I was doing good with my bloods, still had a few low sugars,  but nothing quite dramatic. He walked in and again started laughing at me. My A1C was 5.7!!!!! Seriously?!?!?! That was awesome, that was the bomb-diggity! He was so pleased and stated that I brought down my A1C using LESS insulin! He was shocked by that. He also said that I'm controlling my bloods better than most diabetic (and pregnant diabetics) on a continuous glucose monitor. (Side note: I have a CGM but it's "old" and the sites for it have been discontinued, we tried to get a new one but $$$$ later, I decided to go at it on my own-which apparently is working).
We adjusted my basal rate again because there are still some issues in the mid afternoon time frame. If you look at my blood meter download that he gets (its a graph) from 7AM-12PM my bloods stay in a steady line, once 3PM rolls around it starts spiking and/or dropping then will plateau back out around bedtime 9PM.
I have another appointment in 6 weeks. I'm hoping to keep up all the good work I've done. So far my bloods have been behaving and I just need to stay on this path.

**If this is mumbo-jumbo to you, I apologize. This particular post is more for any curious people, and for me to document.